i have no idea, but the important thing is that you're there and that makes all the difference. best of luck.

Xbox weights more than ps4 so that's probably the best console to knock some sense into him

Originally posted by Corrosion:

For context, this friend turned 28 in February of this year. He also has a host of mental health issues & I guess those are relevant here.

Every birthday of his I know better than to make a "big deal" of the day, because he also has a skewered perception of aging. But since this year's birthday, he's absolutely fixated on the idea that he's old, and that most of his extracurricular goals (guitar, fitness) it's "too late" for.

Now admittedly I have my own mental health struggles and issues related to age, but I have empathy for his all the same. But I am getting tired of trying to "console" — over what, even? — someone who is more or less convinced of this reality.

I don't fully blame him, I know media makes it seem like post-25 it's over (lol) but still, sometimes it feels exhausting.

What do I do?

give him the mindset that every story has an start and an end but the end isnt what matters what occurs between is what truely matters how you use the time you got what story will you make

unfortunately most of life's problems need to be faced alone.

you can't exactly just go up to your friend and tell them that they're having their first crisis of aging in the form of fantasies they were never going to follow up on now becoming apparent as fantasies.

you can't suggest their entire engagement with reality was just a fantasy; they might flip out and try to find something 'real,' unaware that there isn't anything. besides what they ate for lunch maybe.

also can't suggest that they're doing the same thing twice in two different layers. putting off the reality in favor of a fantasy, then getting mad at themselves and putting that off on aging rather than their fantastical desires. for all you know you're focusing on age, and he doesn't even view the engagement with fantasy as the point of frustration.

Tell him to stop being so dramatic. He's 28, not 50.

Originally posted by Marmarmar34:

Tell him to stop being so dramatic. He's 28, not 50.

Oi what you got against 50 year old? 50 is the new 30

Originally posted by Marmarmar34:

Tell him to stop being so dramatic. He's 28, not 50.

xeno's midlife was a really popular pop psychology concept in the late 70s and early 80s. perceiving yourself as halfway to the midlife crisis, and having a miniature one for basically the same reason people usually have one.

Tell him 30 is the new 20.

It's time for him to accept what life is. He needs parents like mine. I was raised by former military. Everything was SHUTUP! MOVE IT! TOO BAD! SUCK IT UP! MOVE IT! THAT'S TRASH, DO IT AGAIN AND THIS TIME DO IT RIGHT! If we were to complain then came the bullying and harassment and the entire NO ONE FEELS SORRY FOR YOU! routine.

You can kiss and hug him.

They told me I only have 3-4 years to live last year but I’ll show those medical youngings how we used to do it back in my day.

Originally posted by Marmarmar34:

Tell him to stop being so dramatic. He's 28, not 50.

Saying that (specially the way you say it) will just make it worse...

You NEVER say to a person with these type of issues to stop being dramatic...

Originally posted by Corrosion:

For context, this friend turned 28 in February of this year. He also has a host of mental health issues & I guess those are relevant here.

Every birthday of his I know better than to make a "big deal" of the day, because he also has a skewered perception of aging. But since this year's birthday, he's absolutely fixated on the idea that he's old, and that most of his extracurricular goals (guitar, fitness) it's "too late" for.

Now admittedly I have my own mental health struggles and issues related to age, but I have empathy for his all the same. But I am getting tired of trying to "console" — over what, even? — someone who is more or less convinced of this reality.

I don't fully blame him, I know media makes it seem like post-25 it's over (lol) but still, sometimes it feels exhausting.

What do I do?

Obviously he will have to accept the reality and adapt, if he is willing to do that even if it takes long time, it will be fine... In most cases, the adaptación process (and acceptation) will just happen on its own as time moves onthis just happens when time moves on a bit...

Try to live to the fullest with your friend and start this new chapter of the story

Originally posted by Corrosion:

How do I console a friend?

Originally posted by eram:

Xbox weights more than ps4 so that's probably the best console to knock some sense into him

I'm concerned that it took me 15 minutes to get this...

Still hilarious.

Originally posted by Marmarmar34:

Tell him to stop being so dramatic. He's 28, not 50.

exactly
just because you're not fresh out of high school doesn't mean you aren't still young