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What is your opinion on arranged marriages part 2 (new)
I hate when mods power trip...
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it is a good thing as long as it is not forced.
Stupid idea. But then again I did tell my parents to ♥♥♥♥ off when they disapproved of my GF (8.5 years together since that time)
I can be quite effective.. but nobody should be forced.

if for example parents (who know their child well) or even church elders) who know their members well) match couples based on compability not emotion..

including sometimes doing things like coupling a person with autism to a person working as a mental healthcare worker.. thus not always selecting the pest pick for everybody but making sure nobody in society gets left begind alone...

well that generally leads to better and more stable marriages.. than ones based on pure emotion..

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but when it is basicly done as in some nations where poor parents get 100 eurro to marry their 6yo daughter to an 60yo muslim man... that clearly has nothing to do with that.
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so yes to arranged marriages if people themselves are open to it (matchmaker make me a match)...and by well meaning parents or religious leaders or some expert (matchmaker/relation agency where those interested in this can themselves register)

no to "auctioning off woman"
Last edited by De Hollandse Ezel; 13 Aug @ 3:42pm
Originally posted by De Hollandse Ezel:
I can be quite effective.. but nobody should be forced.

if for example parents (who know their child well) or even church elders) who know their members well) match couples based on compability not emotion..

including sometimes doing things like coupling a person with autism to a person working as a mental healthcare worker.. thus not always selecting the pest pick for everybody but making sure nobody in society gets left begind alone...

well that generally leads to better and more stable marriages.. than ones based on pure emotion..

====
but when it is basicly done as in some nations where poor parents get 100 eurro to marry their 6yo daughter to an 60yo muslim man... that clearly has nothing to do with that.
====
so yes to arranged marriages if people themselves are open to it (matchmaker make me a match)...and by well meaning parents or religious leaders or some expert (matchmaker/relation agency where those interested in this can themselves register)

no to "auctioning off woman"
So, if they ignore or object to the "well meaning parents or religious leaders"?
Originally posted by Morrandir:
it is a good thing as long as it is not forced.
I agree with this. Arranged marriage have a lower chance of divorce.
Originally posted by Boblin the Goblin:
Originally posted by De Hollandse Ezel:
I can be quite effective.. but nobody should be forced.

if for example parents (who know their child well) or even church elders) who know their members well) match couples based on compability not emotion..

including sometimes doing things like coupling a person with autism to a person working as a mental healthcare worker.. thus not always selecting the pest pick for everybody but making sure nobody in society gets left begind alone...

well that generally leads to better and more stable marriages.. than ones based on pure emotion..

====
but when it is basicly done as in some nations where poor parents get 100 eurro to marry their 6yo daughter to an 60yo muslim man... that clearly has nothing to do with that.
====
so yes to arranged marriages if people themselves are open to it (matchmaker make me a match)...and by well meaning parents or religious leaders or some expert (matchmaker/relation agency where those interested in this can themselves register)

no to "auctioning off woman"
So, if they ignore or object to the "well meaning parents or religious leaders"?

not all arranged marriages are forced. in most cases you ad the person you are being match maked with have the last say in it.
Originally posted by Intelligent Jew Businessman:
Originally posted by Morrandir:
it is a good thing as long as it is not forced.
I agree with this. Arranged marriage have a lower chance of divorce.

also many young people are single because matchmaking is no longer a thing.
Originally posted by Boblin the Goblin:
Originally posted by De Hollandse Ezel:
I can be quite effective.. but nobody should be forced.

if for example parents (who know their child well) or even church elders) who know their members well) match couples based on compability not emotion..

including sometimes doing things like coupling a person with autism to a person working as a mental healthcare worker.. thus not always selecting the pest pick for everybody but making sure nobody in society gets left begind alone...

well that generally leads to better and more stable marriages.. than ones based on pure emotion..

====
but when it is basicly done as in some nations where poor parents get 100 eurro to marry their 6yo daughter to an 60yo muslim man... that clearly has nothing to do with that.
====
so yes to arranged marriages if people themselves are open to it (matchmaker make me a match)...and by well meaning parents or religious leaders or some expert (matchmaker/relation agency where those interested in this can themselves register)

no to "auctioning off woman"
So, if they ignore or object to the "well meaning parents or religious leaders"?

I would say no forced marriaged.. so you should alwas be free to overrule.
arranged does not equate forced.

I am 43 now.. I often joked with a good female friend if were both 40 and still single...
not sure if I actually would have...
but well if I have to pick between growing old alone.. or somebody thats a good match and I can like just have no romantic feeling for.... than that latter might be preferable.. and if somebody else aranges that for me saving me to have to go trough the financial and emotional jungle of datingsites... instead serving me a reasonable canditate say once a month.. and than I sttill get to say yes.. or no... without all that time wasted.. while an relationship expert does all the background checks and psychology tests etc to get somebody that matches properly... well that could work..

in fact.. an older woman I know used to work for an "dating agency" as in fysical agency.. that kind of operated like this..they would analise you properly... than they would set you up with 1 date a month with somebody else in their file... you would pay upon having found a relation (thats when you would pay a relative large sum)
basicly no cure no pay.
or some did only require 1 single payment upfront no matter how long it took to match you.
while they would have talks about how you can make yourself more likable about perhaps lowering your preferations in one area but they would not give up on you

and it worked quite well.. it was only used by those seriously looking for marriage and generally 30+ or 40+ aka getting a bit more desperate..
it was also not cheap like 8-10 per client... they delivered quality..

this is unlike those datingsites that drove these old agencies out of buisnuiss where the chance of finding somebody on them is zero.
Last edited by De Hollandse Ezel; 13 Aug @ 3:56pm
Originally posted by Intelligent Jew Businessman:
I hate when mods power trip...

If that is how your family does things then that should have been something the individuals learned growing up in that environment.

I may not like the fact that it is forced ... but it isn't my place to step in another family's business.

All that said, you really can't change who people fall in love with. That is part of the magic of love.

You have to hope most families that follow those methods change as the future moves forward.
I dont think it is a great idea as It seems to always lead to abuse. The question for me is a little why that kind of thing is necessary anyways these days?
Last edited by Haustier64; 13 Aug @ 4:03pm
xDDD 13 Aug @ 4:06pm 
To be honest... Considering the current state of 20-35 year olds in the west, it'd probably be a good thing.
it is a cultural thing i would personally never wish to do, but as long as it is not forced i suppose there are no issues.
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