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We are not being "jerks". The staff is simply overwhelmed by all the work.
OP is a community of a few hundred thousand users, we try to address everyone at our best.
Like logging out from all sites (and steam) and login again, using another browser, clearing cache, etc? It could be a problem on Steam side for some odd reason..
It's the exact same problem, I'm getting the same error message he did.
"Error code: 0x0411 — We could not receive a valid response from the Steam API to fetch your user data."
Edit: I'm in.