Brawlhalla

Brawlhalla

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How not to be a SMELLY BULLY on brawlhalla; making friends
By Anime Peter Griffin
A guide on how not to be a complete buttface when online and after matches.
   
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Introduction
Hi i'm W A H. please sit and enjoy my advice on not being a buttface.
Topic 1: losing the game
Hello and welcome.

Here's how to be liked and not appear angry at the game. Enjoy.

Topic one: Losing a game

Here is how to remain calm whilst being under the sorrowful influences of a loss.

  1. Start off by breathing. deeply. in and out. Even if you feel really mad, just breathe. No amount of anger will allow you to travel back in time. You lost, now you'll have to deal with it

  2. Now, if the winner hasn't moved on yet, hit enter, and send them a congratulatory message like "You're really good" or "Are you this good in bed?", maybe not that last one, but you get the point.

  3. Maybe vent your anger into fuelling vocabulary, if you failed step one. impress the winner with your voluminous vocabulary and strike up a hearty conversation. [you] "Weather sure is fantastic today!" [them]"Yeah ikr". look at that winner and their pitiful text talk. you may have lost the fight, but you won the englishing competition, that's for sure.

  4. Blame the game. They can't prove you wrong, just say lag. it'll make you feel slightly better.

  5. Finally, there are two paths to go on. "Hey, wanna do 2v2?" or "Good lucck next game!". Try them, it's how you get popular in valhalla, trust me, ask gnash.
𝓢𝓒𝓔𝓝𝓐𝓡𝓘𝓞𝓢

so things weren't set up as you hoped to be, so here's how to deal with scenarios!

  • Winner: "HA EZ L2P NOOB HEHE". Oh what a classic. The winner tries to rub salt on the salty wound with a classy "Look at me i won haha". Well sometimes finding words is difficult, but don't just go to the next battle, respond! Here's a great response: "Good for you", or "I did a poopy sorry" (Just to confuse them) or, last but not least, my personal favourite... "REEEEEEEEEEEEEE". Get's them every time.

  • Winner: "Ur so bad". This is as to be expected - but don't worry! respond with some kind, gentle words, such as "It's okay darling, i just didn't want to hurt you" or "and 'Ur so rad' AYYYYYYYY" or maybe even "I am sorry i was not a good battle standard for you. i hope that the matchmaking process in the game shall grant you a worthier match. I bid you farewell". All work perfectly.
Topic 2: Winning the game
Topic 2: Winning a game

WAHOO. YOU WON FOR ONCE.
Here is how to not be a complete asshat after winning the game.

  1. First up, don't be a buttface and say "EZ N00B ECKS DEE L2P". just don't. that's stupid. chances are, they're read this guide and know how to counter your 'epic speech'.

  2. Second of all, they'll likely start off the coversation with "spammer" or "spam noob learn to play". Just don't do anything. ever. just sit there. on the 1st place podium. "Not knowing how to play". And remember, if they call you out for being a spammer, then you can just think of this. In the event that you actually did spam, they should've been able to predict your next move and move around it like a normal player would. So think before you speak, dungusses.

  3. Lastly, maybe politely just say, "Your attacks were strong, you predicted me well, but maybe look out for if someone repeats the same movement sequence and see how you could avoid getting hit by it next time! well played etc etc". Because comments like that can really make someone's day.
𝓢𝓒𝓔𝓝𝓐𝓡𝓘𝓞𝓢
  • They leave. Then you leave. don't just stand there waiting for something to happen. Just leave. Go on.

  • The person says "YouTube got you hacker!" (actual past experience i have had). Just say "Hi mum!"
Topic 3: Good Game
Just Hit K

or whatever it is for your means of playing
Topic 4: Make New Pals
[h4] Step 4: Make friends [\h4]
The very greatest thing to do to become a good brawlhalla player is not just praise, not just cracking a good joke when it's innapropraite, but just to say "Hey dude, wanna do 2v2" or "Rematch?" and just keep on bonding with them until you're good pals. A good friend can make your game experience more fun and enjoyable, so get out there, stop reading a guide literally telling you how not to be an asshat and to go and make friends, and GO. MAKE. FRIENDS!!!
Final message to Devs and Others
Hey Devs, you should errr buff unarmed. It's too slow and weak. Make it full on dragon ball z style high-speed high-power action.

Nah just kidding. have good day everyone and don't be salty!

I said don't be salty.
12 Comments
Sora-MMK 18 Jul, 2020 @ 3:37pm 
Ah i see. I ran straight into your trap card :P
Jamil237237 8 Mar, 2018 @ 2:37pm 
that llast bit, buff un armed, make it high speed power action, xd i use un armed, forces me to reduce spam, and u cant weapon starve me if i dont use any
sunniko 26 Nov, 2017 @ 5:29pm 
are you- ....this......good in be-:steamsalty: brawlhalla??!!?!!!!!!!!!
cmos 26 Nov, 2017 @ 5:19pm 
NEGRO CHEESE
Anime Peter Griffin  [author] 26 Nov, 2017 @ 11:30am 
@zadupiarz GRRR U SPAMMER
zadupiarz 26 Nov, 2017 @ 7:48am 
thats so funny some people dont have impulse control. just neurotypical things
Anime Peter Griffin  [author] 26 Nov, 2017 @ 5:17am 
that's what this guide is kinda about my dude
zadupiarz 22 Nov, 2017 @ 12:15pm 
lol just dont take the game too seriously
Anime Peter Griffin  [author] 22 Nov, 2017 @ 8:53am 
THanks everyone. good luck not being a smelly bully!
Hellfo - Van 21 Nov, 2017 @ 3:32pm 
lol, nice guide :y gonna use some of the phrases e.e