First of all you need a weed to smoke a weed there are many types of weed I am going to show you how to obtain weed and how to tell the difference between a bad weed and a good weed

Here are two common types:
And here are two types of bad weed:
Now that you know which weed to buy, go to your local asda and buy some (if you live in the us go to a black neighbourhood).

Now its time to roll that ♥♥♥♥ up boi

Grab a lighter or use a gas stove to light the weed, then put it in your mouth.

Congratulations, you smonked your first w33d!