Team Fortress 2

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So You Want To Be A Professional Internet Cyberbully?
By Robot Grimlord Zartron
Or... How to make being mean online helpful

While I'm posting this guide under TF2's community, because it's the game most dear to me, it's applicable to gaming as a whole.
   
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What is a Professional Internet Cyberbully?
Cyberbullying. "The use of electronic communication to bully a person, typically by sending messages of an intimidating or threatening nature". So you want to be a professional Internet Cyberbully... This guide will steer you toward a more effective and professional online bullying style and will also help to provide standards of conduct and tips of the trade.

It should also be stated, now, that the standards of a PROFESSIONAL Internet Cyberbully encourage preservation of gaming communities, freedom of ideas, and even DIS-courage the use of scamming or out-of-match bullying, harassment, and stalking.

Cyberbullying can be accomplished through a variety of mediums, but the focus of this guide will be on video game bullying, though some of the lessons can be used during forum arguments.We will first cover topics explaining motivations and goals for your hostility, as without such an anchor you're no better than Eminem, aiming your anger in no particular direction, spraying and spraying - like a Silver 2 AK pattern in CSGO. Next we will discuss your means of lashing out, as this is the most influential process for developing your artistic (and autistic) work. We'll also compare different approaches to cyber bullying, looking at two of our own particular preferences. We should go ahead and choose our definition of the word "Based" before we proceed. The definition used by this guide is pulled from Urban dictionary: "Often used in contexts where the action or opinion ignores popular trends and social conventions or requires special effort." or "The quality of having an opinion without regard for what other people think, often a controversial opinion but not always."

WHY Do You Want To Be A Professional Internet Cyberbully?
First you must decide on your daily goals of cyberbullying. Certainly, the nature of being a professional internet cyberbully demands the ability to be flexible- survive, adapt and overcome and effectively make use of poor or outdated humor. You may choose to have a nihilistic approach, aimlessly assaulting anyone and everything that moves, but we'll continue the topic of existentialism later. At any given point, however, you will be able to use bullying for your advantage. The most common and effective goal a professional internet cyberbully may bully over, is the act of tilting an opponent.

Tilted, according to an Urban dictionary source: "Gambling term (most common in poker) but also used in video games describing an angry or "reeling" state of mind usually caused by a big or unlucky loss. People playing on tilt play below their usual ability and usually make larger and more aggressive bets to try to quickly recover their loss."
Once an opponent, or an unliked ally, has been effectively upset, they will be more vulnerable to mistakes, leading to poor gameplay, leading to mistakes, leading to poor gameplay, leading to- This is more difficult to pull off when fighting a more skilled enemy (though extremely useful against the self-conscious opponents no matter how good they are) but very good for exploiting a lucky lead or creating a larger gap between a close game.

Other uses for cyberbullying include clout chasing, because being rude can make you popular. Similarly, earning the respect of potentially mutinous teammates can be eased by attacking and insulting anyone who says rushing in for the 3rd time is a bad idea or allys who dare to challenge your place on top of the scoreboard. There are even virtuous reasons to be a bully. Perhaps you can find a way to use bullying to ENHANCE the experience for others, an odd but possible situation. More likely, you might wish to better a community as a whole by bullying it. An example of this would be GTA Online, at some point in its lifespan, when a movement was started by modders to sew so much chaos and hand out so much free money that Rockstar would be forced to provide updates once again. It's been theorized that Teamfortress has shared this problem with a recent (attow) bot invasion, perhaps used to force valve into re-staffing the TF2 team. Another common use is simple enjoyment.

There's a sweet, sarcastic, taste to watching some geek rage in chat about being spawnkilled. The only unprofessional motivation to cyberbully is to drive other players, especially the innocent or naive, out of the game community. (Disclaimer: This does not mean the innocent or naive are exempt from bullying, they're easy targets actually-don't feel too bad about causing a rage quit), but don't encourage people to quit a game for good. Instead, lure new players into getting better and continue playing)
Tools of the Professional Internet Cyberbully
As a Professional Internet Cyberbully, you'll have plenty of tools of trade available to you once you've fully absorbed this guide into your brain folds. Strategies, common practices, literal tools, all change so often and so fast on the internet that getting specific will outdate this guide faster [some internet personality you'll have forgotten about by now's career. Let's categorize our tools for now: Software, Approaches, and your SPECIAL stats.
Software tools involve your literaly ability to buy, script, inject, or follow youtube tutorials to utilize cheats in games. Sometimes, players with high hours or skill in a game will use cheats to quietly enhance their performance for either monetary gain or personal consumption. These people are not called professional internet cyberbullies, but instead shall be categorized as cowards. Real Professionals aren't afraid of ban hammers, public opinion, or your feelings. Truly Professional cyberbullies are likely to change their names to intentionally give away their intentions, or use free/cheap scripts which spam chat with links to the script or alternatively, the most based, outrageous, inflammatory binds imaginable (at time of writing, this would probably include racist propaganda, violent sexism, and insults against protected classes). This is most effective on games where moderation and anti-cheats have all but given up on policing gaming communities, because the victims know, you'll face no punishment for your actions.

Different approaches and perspectives on cyberbullies will most prominently shape the flare of your personality. Character-Roleplay is my personal favorite bullying technique. There are few wrong answers here. Before we proceed, understand, your actual unironic opinions are completely unrelated to your professional life as an internet cyberbully. Maybe, in reality, you're an unironic, genuine, pro-eugenics nasi or maybe you're a good, God-fearing, Christian boy (cyberbullying is man's work, no girls allowed). Your true beliefs may or may not be completely separated from your professional personality, you're in no obligation to believe or standby anything you say online, nor are you required to shed your true feelings. (Disclaimer, if you're gonna role play as Lee Harvy Oswald or Elliot Roger, don't drag me into your trash because you don't know how to hide your ID online, dummy). Now that's been addressed, the more based -> the more inflammatory. The more extreme your apparent opinions, the angrier you'll make the un-internet-initiated. More experienced players may see through your facade (or care less about your beliefs) however. Nihilism is a popular approach to character-cyberbullying, but can become tiresome (or easily overused) as there are fewer prestige ranks of role playing as a nihilist beyond impersonating Rick Sanchez or Milne's Eeyore. Any political or even religious stance has potential to be used as a basis for bullying, where Rule #1 is "Not one step back". The roleplay approach is best used as a full-commit (and is the most fun), shrugging off any unironic dissent and quickly striking down opinions (or people) that don't fit your mold. This is probably the easiest means of bullying an entire server at once as annoying chat binds, mic spam, item names or specific taunts leave the most room for clever thought.

For some, a more personal superiority complex is needed. Focusing on insulting aspects of other players while praising your own is a fickle but effective bully-tool. This may require a lot more social reading and confidence as screaming "you suck" into the mic every time you die is the opposite of bullying. The most effective approach to this vanilla take is focusing on your own success. Since this approach relies heavily on your own ability to outplay others. Embarrassing eliminations, higher performance, and exploitive gameplay is your key to backing up your insults. Don't play fair, because players grow more upset if they believe or know you're playing with some advantage. Don't be afraid of your explotivie play styles, but embrace it and even boast about it. Be proud of being a cheater. Or just being stupid good/lucky. The key to making this approach work while operating in an unlucky streak or without skill is knowing when/who/what to insult and knowing when to stay quiet. Emotional control is a very important pillar to this plan as becoming frustrated completely destroys your own credibility as a professional internet cyberbully. In games where playing the objective is a key element, I suggest simply not, and instead focus on achieving a high K/D. Ignore the objective in favor of opportunities to annoy or anger the other team (or your own team). Alternatively, if focusing on K/D is the norm, you COULD become a try hard and gloat about your match victories despite having poor stats (its all about your social ability to skew other players' views of you) Don't cower when you lose, admit defeat or effectively pass the blame on someone else like a 'heavy teammate' or point out your higher stats despite the loss. As a PROFESSIONAL internet cyberbully, however, dont be afraid to congratulate those on your own or the enemy team, for whatever reason, if you feel like it. Killing them with kindness is still an effective strat, it just requires a little more social confidence to not sound like a beta male. The pro-bro gamer personality fits under this approach but is heavily reliant on your own likability. Remember, with this approach is all about YOUR ability to control hearts and minds with either your pure skill, charisma, or ability to cheat.

There are many ways to play when it comes to cyberbullying, I've stated two of my own favorites here (Character Supremacy and Personal Supremacy) but you should mix your own flavor based on your own skills and personality. Maybe playing off of your own lack of gaming skills could be used as a bully-tool. It all depends on your own individual strengths, weaknesses, creativity, and charisma. Make sure to have fun while putting others down, dont lose sight of your goals. Let's pump the brakes for a moment and explain some points that separate you as a PROFESSIONAL internet cyberbully from those other brainlet barbarians. Professionals. Have standards. Firstly, post-goal bullying. This involves passing beyond the arena of cyberbullying into the realm of potentially illegal harassment. Professional cyberbullies have no use for real-world stalking or profile trolling. Taking game-beef into the real world is not only dangerous, but also cringey as you are revealing that you have either been so emotionally insulted, yourself, that you feel the need for a rematch or that you are so terrible at bullying that you need to milk this one victim. Professionals keep their bullying out of their's/others' personal lives.
Pitfalls of Cyberbullying
Lets discuss some other dangers or pitfalls of cyberbullying. As mentioned in the last chapter, bringing cyberbullying out of a game and into your personal life marks you, personally as a bully. Once upon a time, this was acceptable, but as western society grows more 'progressive' the more you risk being reported and watched by (at best) [social media/gaming platform/forum] staff/communities and (at worst) law enforcement, depending on the intensity of your actions. Above that, it is, by definition, unprofessional. Some other pitfalls to avoid are auto-bans. Some games may automatically kick, ban, report you for using certain "gamer words". Tyranny? Yes, but also a reality. But a good bully can operate even, in a game as controlled as something like roblox. Different games have different levels of case-by-case moderation as well. As of writing, you can say pretty much anything you want in chats like Team fortress because the back log of reports and low staff mean the report box has probably been decommissioned by now. Games like Overwatch may shadow ban your ability to engage in voice chat if you're reported too many times. Other games may dedicate more resources to or have smaller player bases to track for wrong-speak or cyberbullying. Be mindful of your bullying intensity and methods, professional internet cyberbullies are not politicians, you're not obligated to make a stance for free-speech. The most professional maneuver is to break the character at the match over screen and pass around deserved GGs and compliments, though this is certainly not required.

There's a balance to be had when dodging ban hammers for cheats and exploits as well. Valve games, Online Rockstar games, and many others are so compromised that you can cheat quite freely without consequence. However, some games may be able to find and end you more easily. Don't risk your personal assets to cheat- don't use a premium account, install some free backwoods aim bot, then be suprised-pikatchu-faced when you lose it all. Earlier, I mentioned to fear not the ban hammer. This is true, because you shouldn't put yourself in a position to fear the hammer (by risking anything of value) and even more so, a talented Professional Internet Cyberbully can operate within the guidelines of most gaming environments, regardless of ban activity- without cowardice. Professionals are adaptable, but honest. Another pitfall to avoid, is karma. Whether you believe in karma or not, the mere suggestion of its existance is enough to multiple the penalty of your mistakes. If an opponent perceives that you may have 'got what you deserved', no matter whose fault or fortune was involved, they will have achieved a great victory in their own mind. How you handle the situations may change the tide of the pysche war you've engaged in; personally I've found that making fun of my own mistakes or playing them off 'things to expect in a public lobby' can sometimes steal the opportunity for someone else to call you out. Having a good time while you bully others is a good rule of thumb to keep other players in a jealous state of mind as opposed to a counter-offensive state of mind. Lastly, the most important mistake to avoid as a PROFESSIONAL, is to avoid damaging the community as a whole. While systematic bullying can be used as a means to help shape a community, PROFESSIONALS, do not seek the destruction or gatekeeping of gaming communities. Such actions are cowardly and used by elitists to lower or eliminate potential competition.
Professional Internet Cyberbullies Have Standards
Certification: In order to receive your official P.I.C.B. certification license card, you must agree to uphold the following standards:
I. Don't be cringe. This includes stalking randoms out of game and offline.
II. Don't be emotionally sensitive.
III. Don't gate keep or drive other players away.
IV. Don't solicite other players for stupid stuff. This includes actual, unironic scamming- game related or not.


Professionals Have Standards. This secion seeks to clarify some of the standards required to maintain your status as a PROFESSIONAL Internet Cyberbully. The general standard, is to keep your personal nonsense and your gamer nonsense separate. There are 4 Primary Rules, listed above. The first addresses offline bullying. The second is to protect your own image, ergo, protecting the image of other professionals. The third may be deceiving- it does NOT discourage... the encouragement of rage quitting, but instead focuses on pushing new players out of a game. There is no law against bullying a new player (or anyone for that matter- there are no protected classes online), but you should, at least try to, show consideration when discerning another player's tolerances for your intensity of bullying. The fourth rule is like the second, don't be an unprofessional dirtbag. Work for a living and git good.
God Speed, Fellow Professional Internet Cyberbullies
In summary, engaging in Professional Internet Cyberbullying is not only useful to gamers and communities but also fun. Being a bully is the best protection from being bullied and is most effective when you sharpen both your gaming skills and social skills. So why-ever you choose to bully, get out there and keep it professional. Pick up your License to Bully by the exit door... https://imgur.com/a/k0jUxdw
6 Comments
pebblepenis77 15 Dec, 2020 @ 6:20am 
finally a good steam guide
Kerstab 20 Nov, 2020 @ 9:54pm 
Wow this is actually good
the joggler [SCRAPTV] 20 Nov, 2020 @ 3:14pm 
Incredibly based, OP. Adding this to favorites
Lagarus 19 Nov, 2020 @ 6:42pm 
"Here we are boy, Bullworth Academy"
Conni | MTM | 17 Nov, 2020 @ 9:39am 
We need to make an oath for this shit lol
Self-Professed Pimp 17 Nov, 2020 @ 6:12am 
the perfect example of professionals have standards