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I hope this reaches you, all I wanted to say to you is I think you should go dumpster diving and get mauled by raccoons and go to a Burger King and eat a burger just to find out that their were fire ants inside of it, then you get multiple bites inside of your throat, stomach, intestines and A**hole, then cry your self to sleep and if you have a girlfriend(which you probably don't) she breaks up with you and reveals she was sleeping with your best friend chad (if you can somehow get a friend).
worst regards - The Clean Tess