So the weapons you need to equip are:

1. The 'Ali Baba's Wee Booties' or 'The Bootlegger'

2. Any shield

3. The Frying Pan (Achieved from L4D2 or can be traded)

This is the most important part of this guide, ok? These hats will give you respect and make you a god, trust me. I've played with and without them before.

1. The 'Bounty Hat' (can be bought from steam market or traded)

2. The 'Dangersesque, Too?' (must be gotten from 'poker night at the inventory' with a steam key)

3. If you can't get #2, then any glasses will do.

You're done! you have all the equipment necessary to become a god at TF2 and have no skill whatsoever! Now go out into the world and slap everyone with that pan