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You can tweak the ages, how many children it kicks in at etc.
EDIT: Fixed the logic so that any child the man has that is mothered by the woman stops the malus being applied.
I do it in line 1376 and 1409 of the mod's \common\scripted_modifiers\zz_00_marriage_scripted_modifiers_less_old_wives.txt
First where the actor is the boy and the recipient is the woman
marriage_fertile_age_reverse_value is defined in the mod's \common\script_values\zz_00_interaction_values_less_old_wives.txt
marriage_fertile_age_value is defined in vanilla \common\script_values\00_interaction_values.txt
Because I change the marriage_fertile_age_value from 45 to 29. This means that a 13 year gap is allowed (29-16=13). If you want to reduce it to a 10 year age gap, reduce marriage_fertile_age_value in the modifier from 29 to 27, and to make it apply to both you can # out the is_female requirement (which means you can delete the entire scope:secondary_actor block) like this where the recipient is the child:
I think you can simplify the version where the actor is the child to the reverse (I haven't thought it through fully, so double check to make sure that is right)