-You haven't eaten anything in days, and seemingly thought you didn't need to eat, but suddenly the most dreaded hunger and pain fills your stomach as you realize you have begun digesting yourself.

The Part Time Worker: Hello, welcome to McDonald's how can I take your order please?

You: PLEASE! GIVE ME A MCRIB!

The Part Time Worker: Oh sorry sir, we stopped selling McRibs.

You: What?

The Part Time Worker: Yes sir, in accordance with the government control over the amount of beef and pork used in order to stop the COW Wars, we legally had to stop serving them.

You: Why the ♥♥♥♥ would they stop selling the McRib? No McRib?! This is a serious apocalyptic scenario. Why the ♥♥♥♥ would they do that?!

The Part Time Worker: Take a McGriddle and ♥♥♥♥ off, you're weirdly hung up over this.

You: I think you fail to understand.

*You convulse.*

You: M C R I B

*You lose yourself to the power of the McRib gods, and tear the man to shreds becoming a McRibwich Lich. Start Running.*



Run. Immediately. Then activate the explosive devices embedded in each McDonald's Backroom branch, the alarm will sound to evacuate (in the rare circumstance multiple parties are inside. It is tuned to a frequency the McRibwich Lich cannot hear. If possible, fight and shoot to kill and destroy the corpse.

Originally posted by Ronald "The ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥" McDonald:

McDonald's Document has been Verfied as of 7/14/2022