Nobody likes the cave people.

Oy vey!
Invite your friends or be beaten mercilessly with wooden clubs.

Here are five reasons you should believe in Jesus-

1. If you don't, I'll beat you with a club.

2. If you do, you get to ride a pony around a field once a month.

3. You get a cool tattoo of a cross on your forehead.

4. You get small discounts at your local supermarket.

5. You get to watch videos of amputations live.

6. I am in pain.