YOU WANT ACTION? YOU WANT STRATEGY? YOU WANT GIGANTIC ROMANTIC BATTLES WHOSE SCALE RIVALS THAT OF YOUR MOTHER? WELL SIT THE ♥♥♥♥ DOWN AND SHUT YOUR ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ MOUTH, SALLY MAE! BECAUSE THIS IS THE ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ GAME FOR YOU!

YOU CAN PLAY AS THE RED XENOPHOBIC PRICKS, THE BLUE XENOPHOBIC PRICKS, OR THE GREEN XENOPHOBIC PRICKS IN THEIR QUEST TO DOMINATE EVERYONE THAT ISN'T A GLORIOUS PROGENITOR OF ROMULUS! WITNESS AS YOU CAN ♥♥♥♥ YOUR WIFE AND HAVE HER ♥♥♥♥ OUT SOME CROTCH-FRUIT TO RULE YOUR EMPIRE WHEN YOU BECOME A ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ WHITHERED OLD HUSK OF AN OLD MAN AND DIE! TREMBLE AS YOUR ARMIES FACE DOWN HORRIFYING BROWN PEOPLE ON TOP OF ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ELEPHANTS! AND LEARN TO ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ MANAGE YOUR CITIES OR YOUR INCOMPETANT INBRED NEPHEW WILL ♥♥♥♥ OVER THE ENTIRE EASTERN PROVINCE BECAUSE HE COULDN'T KEEP HIS HANDS OFF THE LADYBOYS!

JUST PLAY THIS ♥♥♥♥ ALREADY ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

I nominated this game for The "Test of Time" award because it deserves it. Absolutely deserves it.