L.A. Noire has to be one of the most over-rated games I've ever played. First of all, this game is sold as an open-world game. Well, you don’t get to do anything but going to the locations you need to investigate, so if you can call that open world, then I’d rather play non-open-world games. But this isn’t the main problem with the game, in fact, the game has a lot of problems. One of the most annoying problems is that it is a terrible, unoptimized mod locked at 30 fps. You can bypass this with apps like Widescreen Fixer, but still, the game runs terrible, you can be facing a wall and getting 22 fps or looking at the city and getting 60. They are jumping all the time, making it really annoying to play. Fortunately, this game is more of free-roam point-and-click game rather than the action game they try to sell us here.

Another problem is the linear and extremely repetitive gameplay. You will end up waiting for the clue sound, realizing that you won’t find anything in bodies unless they’ve been strangled, had a ring or a watch, or a document in one of the pockets – so don’t look at the corpses’ hands or heads unless any of this conditions apply. The “distractors” are sometimes so random they don’t even make sense. There’s this mission where a card has been crashed near a sign and this dead woman with a blunt force trauma injury to the head. I found a golf club outside the perimeter, but Phelps said “this doesn’t pertain to the case”; well, why do we need CSI if we have Phelp’s magnificent nose! On another crime scene I remember finding a knife, seriously, a knife!, which of course was “circumstantial”.

Then we have the acting. So many popular actors, and such a terrible acting. Phelps sounds like a cyclothymic freak who has just escaped some mental asylum, dressed as a cop and started questioning everyone. Seriously, he’s mood is so borderline he can go from being the good cope to a maniac in no time. I’m sure this doesn’t have to do with the actors, but with poor scripting and the editors joining the audio with the scenes in a not realistic way.

The interrogation in the game usually makes no sense. Either the suspects make some very obvious lying expressions, or they don’t. And some times, they look like they are obviously lying but you get it wrong. This doesn’t affect your progress except in one case, so who cares? Phelps will be accusing everyone of lying anyway.

Finally, the action scenes… they are pathetic, so say the least. The shooting is so stiff and boring you just can wait with your gun out and shoot everyone with one clip. And the driving/chasing scenarios are god-awful. Usually, the car you are pursuing will accelerate breaking physics laws and making turns so robotically you will end up crashing against a corner most of the times, not to mention than driving is so irritating you will be asking your partner to drive to most locations just to avoid it. There’s also one of the last sections in the game where you have to escort a car and some police cars are trying to take it out, and by just bumping into one of these cars they immediately dismantle – it’s hilarious!. It’s a good thing they added the option of skipping this stupid parts of the game after you fail them twice.

One thing I did like of the game was the face animations… that I will be missing in probably all non-AAA games, but that doesn’t compensate for this mediocre, over-rated piece of crap.


Seriously, avoid this game. Or borrow it from a friend, or even use steam family share. But please, save some bucks and don’t buy it even if it is on sale like I did.

L.A. Noire has to be one of the most over-rated games I've ever played. First of all, this game is sold as an open-world game. Well, you don’t get to do anything but going to the locations you need to investigate, so if you can call that open world, then I’d rather play non-open-world games. But this isn’t the main problem with the game, in fact, the game has a lot of problems. One of the most annoying problems is that it is a terrible, unoptimized mod locked at 30 fps. You can bypass this with apps like Widescreen Fixer, but still, the game runs terrible, you can be facing a wall and getting 22 fps or looking at the city and getting 60. They are jumping all the time, making it really annoying to play. Fortunately, this game is more of free-roam point-and-click game rather than the action game they try to sell us here. Another problem is the linear and extremely repetitive gameplay. You will end up waiting for the clue sound, realizing that you won’t find anything in bodies unless they’ve been strangled, had a ring or a watch, or a document in one of the pockets – so don’t look at the corpses’ hands or heads unless any of this conditions apply. The “distractors” are sometimes so random they don’t even make sense. There’s this mission where a card has been crashed near a sign and this dead woman with a blunt force trauma injury to the head. I found a golf club outside the perimeter, but Phelps said “this doesn’t pertain to the case”; well, why do we need CSI if we have Phelp’s magnificent nose! On another crime scene I remember finding a knife, seriously, a knife!, which of course was “circumstantial”. Then we have the acting. So many popular actors, and such a terrible acting. Phelps sounds like a cyclothymic freak who has just escaped some mental asylum, dressed as a cop and started questioning everyone. Seriously, he’s mood is so borderline he can go from being the good cope to a maniac in no time. I’m sure this doesn’t have to do with the actors, but with poor scripting and the editors joining the audio with the scenes in a not realistic way. The interrogation in the game usually makes no sense. Either the suspects make some very obvious lying expressions, or they don’t. And some times, they look like they are obviously lying but you get it wrong. This doesn’t affect your progress except in one case, so who cares? Phelps will be accusing everyone of lying anyway. Finally, the action scenes… they are pathetic, so say the least. The shooting is so stiff and boring you just can wait with your gun out and shoot everyone with one clip. And the driving/chasing scenarios are god-awful. Usually, the car you are pursuing will accelerate breaking physics laws and making turns so robotically you will end up crashing against a corner most of the times, not to mention than driving is so irritating you will be asking your partner to drive to most locations just to avoid it. There’s also one of the last sections in the game where you have to escort a car and some police cars are trying to take it out, and by just bumping into one of these cars they immediately dismantle – it’s hilarious!. It’s a good thing they added the option of skipping this stupid parts of the game after you fail them twice. One thing I did like of the game was the face animations… that I will be missing in probably all non-AAA games, but that doesn’t compensate for this mediocre, over-rated piece of crap. Seriously, avoid this game. Or borrow it from a friend, or even use steam family share. But please, save some bucks and don’t buy it even if it is on sale like I did.