45 people found this review helpful
65 people found this review funny
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Recommended
0.0 hrs last two weeks / 2.2 hrs on record (2.2 hrs at review time)
Posted: 1 Jun, 2021 @ 9:31pm

I was only 19 years old I loved Mao so much, I had all the quotations and little red books

I pray to Mao every night before bed thanking him for the wondrous socialist life I've been given.

Mao is love, I say, Mao is life

My reactionary landlord overhears me and calls me a commie traitor

I knew he was just jealous of my devotion for Mao

I called him a bourgeois oppressive capitalist roader

He slaps me and sends me to go to harvest grain for rent

I'm crying now, and my face hurts

I lay in bed and it's really cold

A warmth is moving towards me.

I feel something touch me

It's the glorious heat of our Sun in the Sky Chairman Mao

I am so happy

He whispers into ear "this is our New China”

He grabs me with his powerful Hunanese hands and puts me on my hands and knees

I'm ready

I engage in Mass Line for Mao

He penetrates my frontlines with guerrilla forces

It hurts so much but I do it for Mao

I can feel my reactionary tendencies tearing as my eyes start to water

I push against his force

I want to please Mao

He roars a mighty roar as he fills my soul with his knowledge of People’s War

My landlord walks in

Mao looks him straight in the eye and says "Three Years Reconstruction, Ten Years Planned Economic Construction".

Mao leaves by taking a Great Leap Forward out of my window



Mao is love, Mao is life.
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5 Comments
IHateMao 26 Aug, 2022 @ 5:55pm 
Amazing. And, actually, quite accurate to Mao's real life disposition.
yThunderBoy 9 Apr, 2022 @ 9:52am 
Real
Sta-au 18 Nov, 2021 @ 10:54pm 
This is awesome
Golden Five-Bear 28 Oct, 2021 @ 9:10am 
he love he life like shrek
DOOMJESUS 27 Aug, 2021 @ 12:47pm 
I BELIEVE IT'S CALLED SATIRE.