Recent reviews by The Ultimate Potato

Around 700 units copied from the real world. The numbers are just staggering. Unfortunately - so is the micromanagement. I'm not hardcore enough for this, although I definitely enjoy the grandeur.

This game is absolutely amazing, and especially the first few playthroughs. But consider this: one game seems impossible to finish in less than 8 hours. And it is best that you look at all the tutorials in the world before starting, even though the learning curve is not as steep as for similar products.
While it may slowly lose its appeal after multiple playthroughs, it's definitely worth the purchase if only for those fantastic first few. You'll end up only playing it once every few months, but still enjoy the hell out of it. I'll go out on a limb and say that should you have any kids, they will definitely benefit from the educational side of this game. You pick up a ton of historical facts without ever noticing.


It is very important that you either buy the complete package, though. Otherwise don't bother. Vanilla Civ5, as well as the Gods&Kings expansions were almost terrible on their own. The Brave New World DLC is an absolute must! Do not bother buying this game if you are not going to get the complete pack.

Overall I am very pleased with Civ5. Just remember to buy the complete pack. Civ5 was a complete mess before the expansion packs.

An interesting experiment. After 3 hours I will never touch it again, but it was nice nonetheless.

I can't quite put my finger on it, but I really, really enjoyed this game. It is completely different in many ways from say - Hitman: Blood Money (which you should definitely play first if you haven't), but I believe most of these changes were either necessary or in good taste. The graphics are a huge improvement, the soundtrack is fantastic, the dialogues are well written and there are tons of goofy easter eggs in the grim setting of Absolution.

Just one little thing. Checkpoints are bugged. There is no other way to play this game than on purist (the highest difficulty).
Picking this difficulty will eliminate checkpoints (that are broken anyway), remove ESP and make the game more pleasant overall. Anyone who gives this game a bad review was probably playing on normal, and complaining about the broken checkpoints or built-in wallhack.

No really, playing on low difficulty is like playing as Charles Xavier from the X-men. The only thing missing is mind control and psychic beams.


Definitely buy this game after you've finished blood money, and Absolution is on sale. Just remember this: there are no glitches on the highest difficulty.

There won't be any spoilers in this review, feel free to read on.

Bioshock Infinite is the definition of mediocrity. The amount of lazy cliches, corner-cutting and penny pinching result in such predictability, such wealth of minor glitches and such a ton of plotholes that you'd think you were playing an outsourced movie license game. It has all the hallmarks of lazy game design, corporate corner-cutting, an impossible deadline and underfunding. The game engine, the graphics, the gameplay, the abilities - they're all exactly the same as in Bioshock 1. The story is far worse, and comes with an array of plotholes. You do not get to make any choices in the story, and control is very often taken away from the player in a ridiculous fashion.

It doesn't bring anything new to the table. It could just as well be a 15$ set of bonus levels to Bioshock 1.

To mask this, they try very hard to be over the top. Instead of having a well-rounded game, you have absolute mediocrity, followed by action movie cutscenes with predictable betrayals, pointless sequences. You then go back to killing of a grotesque amount of braindead AI bullet sponges with no significance to the story. While some effort must have gone into the scripted Michael Bay style cutscenes with zeppelins and buildings exploding in bright orange colours every 5 minutes, the game itself doesn't have a single breakable vase or balloon in it. Birds fly through walls, even during indoor sequences, the AI often gets stuck, boring battles are "enchanced" with the infamous "shaky camera" and so on.

My #1 gripe is how artificial it feels. Forget the flying city, the least believable thing in Bioshock Infinite are the inhabitants. The level designers and artists tried very hard to make a thriving city uprooted from early 1900's America, but instead you feel like you're in a zoo, and everyone else is behind glass.

Characters will wait until you're within hearing range to say their one sentence and then stand still for eternity. More often than not, the one liner compliments your handsomeness. I can't walk 10 steps in real life without hearing that so it's particuarly annoying to me, as well as whoever is likely reading this review. If that doesn't feel like a low blow and lazy game design for retaining consumers then I don't know what is.
You can find out much more about the story by listening to pre-recorded messages on voxophones, but you're often interrupted by some scripted event, such as more enemies or a complete stranger telling you that they find you attractive.
Linearity adds to the artificial feel, the decisions you have to make in the game are cosmetic, and there's even a stupid scene where you lose control of your character and watch in first person as he kills someone vital to the story, just when he was about to explain one of the biggest mysteries in the game.

Bioshock Infinite is perhaps one of the clearest example of bribes and corruption in the "gaming press". This is one of the highest-rated games of all time. In particular, people tend to latch onto the ending.

Without spoiling anything whatsoever, I'll say what I think about the ending. Had they pulled it off, it might have been deserving of the praise, but not when it has this many errors visible at first sight. It takes a thought experiment where you place yourself as a lobotomised hollywood consumer in order to see what you're actually supposed to be impressed about. You can't attempt to enjoy it until you find out how to rationalise the multitude of glaring plotholes for the sake of artistic value. I like what they tried to pull off, but it's been done many, many times before, and a lot more convincingly at that.
Nonetheless it both has and will continue to rock the world of many people who've never encountered the concept before, as well as those lucky fellows who were too engaged into the game too much to notice the blunders.

This is a full priced game from people rich enough to bribe all of the big gaming press. In particular I would like to draw your attention to CrowbCat's montage of the lies surrounding this title.

Bioshock 1 was such a success because it touched on Ayn Rand. Something that had never been done properly before. It was enjoyable, convincing, an interesting lore and memorable quotes. It still remains as one of the few, if not the only artistic take on that particular ideology that is actually interesting. It was impossible to build Rapture anywhere else.
Bioshock Infinite gives us perfect linearity as seen in Serious Sam, stagnant gameplay of movie-license titles, characters that are less believable than a flying city and enough cliches to put the to shame.


In my opinion this is the definition of mediocrity. Bioshock 1 had better immersion, Bioshock 2 had better gameplay. Bioshock Infinite has nothing, unless you legitimately enjoy predictable action movies where the story makes no sense, but there's explosions and DON'T YOU DIE ON ME. That's all you're getting. Though I did like the fact that Shrek makes an appearance.

tl;dr
ken levine payed me/10
It tries to be something that it isn't, lacking in many aspects. Overall 100/100 - IGN

You can tell this is a whole different product. They've done a great job on some things, not so much on others.

I absolutely hate the new worm editor, team editor and map editor. That, and the menu is so console oriented it hurts.

Thankfully, though, the gameplay is still very good. My only gripe are scientist worms, which are noticabely more powerful than everyone else, especially the sentry guns.

Apart from that, the game is surprisingly balanced. Whilst Worms Reloaded is garbage in my opinion, Worms Revolution is a good idea for any worms fan. Definitely worth a shot

I've never been a fan of strategy games on the PC. The turn based ones just aren't very good on this platform, whilst the RTS genre boils down to who can micromanage their units faster, in a powergaming orgy of 9.67 clicks a second. I'm a potato, not an octopus with jackhammer fingers.

If like me, you enjoyed things like advance wars and were born without the gift of being Asian, you'll find this game amazing, it's exactly what I've always been looking for.. Instead of using your brain to compute the fastest possible clicking pattern to achieve perfect micromanagement, everything here is down to planning.
You have 120 seconds in multiplayer, and forever in the campaign to manage your squad of six, and this squad of yours will get smaller very fast if you don't take your time.

Should you decide to buy this game (which happens to be a very good idea), I would recommend you do that in a retail store, or on your country's version of ebay. I got my copy for 19$ when it was triple that on steam.

And make sure you either play on Classic difficulty, or Normal difficulty with the Ironman setting. Don't be a sissy

It's pretty cool, but I finished the whole game in 54 minutes

You have to shoot Appollo in the ♥♥♥♥ with cannons, you can play as Bachus, patron of the half-naked, drunk fat people

Now that's out of the way, let's review. The game is best summed up as "Monty Python Bowling". It has a phenomenally executed art style. The 2d cutscenes and menu screen look like something John Cleese would've designed himself.

As for the gameplay, essentially you have to set up a tower defense on your side of the mountain (there are over 20 maps) and get through your opponent's defence using a rather inert boulder, similair to those platformer bowling games. Your workers make a new boulder every now and then and it takes a while to smash the enemy castle. The gameplay is somewhat balanced, although cow defences are sadly underpowered.

The game itself is worth buying for the sole reason of how climatic it is. It has a fair price for shooting Appollo in the ♥♥♥♥. With cannons

It's Serious Sam. You know exactly what you're getting. If it's on a discount, go buy it