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HE WILL NOT DIVIDE US REDUX

It is recommended that you subscribe to this collection -These playermodels fix the purple eyes in the game.

This map is very poorly optimised because I don't legitimately know how to use hammer. I'm going to eventually work out everything though.

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Welcome to Astoria, Queens, New York, where nobody knows how to park even if they had a greasy, soviet era moped and every restaurant except Starbucks and Applebee’s is run by filthy carrot growing Greek lineage. There are so many Catholic Schools the priests don’t know who to touch first, but half the time the kids are blowing O-rings in the hookah lounges on every street corner. Astoria is patrolled by the 114th Precinct which means they usually sitting on their backskins in the office, because nothing happens here besides white-collar crime and ungodly annoying liberal art projects. The only thing good this borough has seen in the last 50 years is the production of Sesame Street and the Onion’s use of the Kaufman Astoria studios. Most nights, you can find Italians breeding in the streets, and alleyways filled with teenage drinkers.

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You’ve been visiting your Polish Grandmother who just very recently died because a Possessed Rottweiler put an electrified cattle prod up her fartbox. As you try to scrap up the money to go home, you notice an awful lot of noises during nights. It turns out that washed up movie actor, Shia LeBeouf, has taken to expressive arts in a way that is constantly disrupting your nightly self-love time. Explore the city and find various ways to put an end to the movement.

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ALL Map credit goes to the original author. This is a redux/remix that adds elements I find personally desirable in a level.


Big changes from original map
-Broke every area portal in the map so now it’s laggy as hell (Top priority- I’m working to fix this)

FIXED

-Cars are now parked on their respective sides of the road because this is America
-Overhauled the lighting and broke it in some areas in the process making the map super dark and hard to see
-You can now go into Papa John’s and harass the minimum wage employee in the kitchen.
-The map is now a closed circuit which means you don’t have to look straight into that ugly skybox anymore- speaking of which I need to change
-All NPCs have somewhat functional weapons with semi-working animations (compared to the not-even-supposed-to-be-in-the-game Annabelle)
-SWAT and Ugly Human Dogs will now leave the police station (we repaired the cerebral function switch)
-I autistically looked on google maps and Wikipedia as well as took satellite screenshots of the block for design reference
-Glass Panes are now visible (beforehand they were being deleted out of the map due to material errors)
-Removed hill that went to nowhere (New York doesn’t have any of those)
-Surrounded the map with super-brite skyscrapers so you can blind yourself sitting in your pitch-black room
-Moved the construction site and the hobo hideout
-Moved the police station
-Added roads with crosswalks for you jay walking heathens
-Terrorist Hideout is now smaller and has less dead Asian women inside
-Fixed scoop’s apartment because it was nasty and dirty


Updates I plan to do
-Redo all the voice acting or hire someone on fivver to do it because I can’t understand a word the Swedish accents are saying
-Add Papa John’s Memes
-Add places to parkour (you can kinda do it now but it’s hard)
-Add sidequests like Chill’s Maps
-Get better museum textures
-Add more moving cars
-Replace one of the skyscrapers with Applebee’s
-Get rid of all the anime
-Add more NPCs
-Turn the Terrorist Hideout into a Pepsi Warehouse
-Fix the telephone poles
-Do something cool with the crane
-Take the stunsticks away from the dogs
-Make a hobo fort
-Add day and night cycle
-Make your poor little computer drop its frames
-Profusely beat myself off while I read all your unfunny comments


Start of Development
I was originally just looking for workshop player models to fix the missing eyes in the textures, but I was also interested in learning how to use hammer. I thought this map would be a good place to start since it had both scripted NPC events and regular building.

In some ways this was a great start to my mapping, but in certain areas I feel like I’m just chasing my tail. Certain brushes and buildings on the map are completely out of line with each other and at times there are just random and sporadic alignments with objects in the world. This caused many trial and errors as I would have more leaks than I could count.

Looking back on the work I’ve done so far; I think I’ve made great improvements considering I have only been mapping for about two weeks. I have completely added another element to this map, and I feel as if it plays more to its exploration style.

I plan to continue working on this, and I would greatly not appreciate feedback. Everyday thanks to daddy Corona Virus, I have a chance to stay up for 14 hours and constantly compile, fix, log, and update the map. If you have a complaint, please post it in the comments so I can not care.


CREDITS:
Original Map: Lumehr
Edited Map: GiddenHippster (Me)
Textures: “All models were taken from the Steam Workshop.” But mostly Lumehr for taking the time to find all of them.
Stayed in Room for a week: Me
Eated Hot Chips and Lyed: Also Me
Added a single EP2 Model at the top of the hotel making it the only error in the game: Lumehr
Actual Cannibal: Shia LeBeouf