Call of Duty: Black Ops III

Call of Duty: Black Ops III

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Your Map Is ♥♥♥♥ [Episode 1] (This Truly Sends Bad Agents And Chemicals To My Brain)
By P Diddy's Court Verdict
ATTENTION: This guide is meant for comedic purposes. Just because a map makes it on this guide doesn't necessarily make it a bad map (even though it might be). Please don't take this seriously. He also stated that this is his first map.
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Basic Information
Down The Toilet...
Alright so we have a great start. I think we spent a max amount of time of about... hmm... let's see... 3 minutes in radiant to design this room? Have to love how sharp the hills are and how there is a random window inside of the fence. Also why does the new round sound sound like I tried to vacuum up a quarter?
As you can see, in a desperate attempt to make the map not feel empty, they scattered a miniscule amount of props by the walls. In this case, a rack.
Yes, they had the nerve to make a room without a single prop. This is emptier than all the bottles of alcohol dad drank (dad please come home). This leaves more space open than the stage from Kino Der Toten x2. A child trying to color in an entire coloring sheet in 15 seconds would have more detail than this crap.
Why does the pack a punch room have like 3x more detail than the rest of the map? That's like drawing your own original Sonic character poorly in MS paint and in the middle just have a picture of the actual Sonic.
For some reason when I stand in this doorway I take damage, I don't know why the ♥♥♥♥ this happens.
Once again, a very small part of the map is more detailed than the rest. In this case, it's a model.
So he decides to put the power in the last room of the map, meaning you can't buy any perk apart from solo quick revive until you buy open the door to the last room. How about when I flip that switch it gives the map maker the power to get off his lazy ass and make an actually good map?
I'm only at round 4 and I've gotten to the buyable ending. I didn't even purchase a weapon yet. And what was the map maker thinking? Did he really think we were going to take the time to earn 15000 points to beat the map?
How about I take those points and buy a lawyer to sue you for the trauma this map has caused to me?
9 Comments
P Diddy's Court Verdict  [author] 19 May, 2021 @ 4:48pm 
I'm already making episode 2 so maybe I'll do that for the third episode
Anime Peter Griffin 19 May, 2021 @ 3:01pm 
Do the saw map
P Diddy's Court Verdict  [author] 18 May, 2021 @ 7:39pm 
He inspired me to do this, in fact.
「Genz」 18 May, 2021 @ 7:10pm 
This reminds me of tomikaze's reviews of World at War Custom Maps , I think it's a nice series that you can do. I look forward to the next one.
Sofocls 17 May, 2021 @ 6:46pm 
I patiently await episode two. (this was great btw!)
P Diddy's Court Verdict  [author] 15 May, 2021 @ 9:02pm 
i'll make another when this gets more attention
P Diddy's Court Verdict  [author] 15 May, 2021 @ 9:00pm 
i've uploaded an even worse map tbf, it was taken down lmfao
DevonSFM 14 May, 2021 @ 4:09pm 
same