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I've got brains and a personality
I wear my glasses sincerely
And my T-shirts ironically
There're some things you can't learn in a class
Or else I'd sign you up for "Intro to how not to be a social outcast"
You're just so early 2013
I was the cool form of uncool before uncool became a thing
I use an app to pair pork with the perfect Bordeaux
Too bad there's no app to neutralize your B.O.
While you're lost in Second Life letting your fingernails grow long
I'll be syncing up my iPhone, tablet, TV and your mom