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Comrade BoB

In the infinitesimal Sea, countless pockets of air housed worlds, teeming with various forms of life. There were non sentient particles, lobotomized living creatures, and sentient life capable of advanced thinking such as pondering if water is wet. No world was the same, each one a different realm… Well, not really, I lied. A lot of them are kinda the same but y’know infinite worlds or something.
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ Moving forward, let’s narrow the scope to something much more interesting and cooler and Jetmainstream. In the boundless Sea, there are vague regions of worlds that share broad similarities. To get to the point, one region contains worlds of Calamity: Where the native sentient life have to fear from hostiles from their world and cosmic horrors beyond the shell. Like Cthuhlu, he’s cool but he’s wanted in 37 Calamity Worlds and banned from most public spaces because he got into a scuffle that interfered with a Celestial’s entertainment so he’s a no-show.
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ On threats that are actually relevant, the sentient life of Calamity Worlds have to fear: local demon henchmen under the mob boss of the Underworld Wall of Flesh, cultists fanboys who can’t get over Cthulhu being not ending their world in the year 2012; disregarding the Cthulhu wanna-be who lives on the moon. Those are just the native threats of the world, the invasive hostiles include but are not limited to: A giant shroom crab, toxic gamer cyborg-wasp, a trio of blazing chicken nuggets, the void itself, Duke senior, dragon-bird-phoenix, and so on.
‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ Exposition aside, the ultimate lifeform that precedes all throughout Calamity and Underworld, is the honored one Bundle of “BoB” Balloons. For years, BoB has conquested, defeating foes and bosses alike. When BoB challenged Eater of Worlds, EoW pulled a Christopher Columbus and left for a new world. When BoB showed up to the fat competition, his opponent was Leviathan; so, BoB ate Leviathan and won. When the Plaguebringer Goliath tried to sting and pop BoB, the toxic bee had an allergic reaction then collapsed dead. When the chicken nugget trio tried to jump BoB, he ate them knowing they’d be too spicy. BoB ignored the giant old fish, he was not a fan, proper rubbish innit. When the DoG pulled up after his cousin EoW fled, BoB activated his trap card: “Devourer of Devourers of Gods,” leaving DoG absolutely flabbergasted and tearing reality to flee in terror.
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ When Yharon “Roar of” The Jungle Dragon blazed420’d into BoB’s view, he posed the question. “Are you the best accessory because you’re BoB or are you BoB because you are the best accessory?” In reply, BoB uttered “Nah, I’d win,” which confused Yharon, thus giving BoB an opening, allowing him to follow up by using his Domain Expansion: Boundless Balloons. Infinite Balloons ascended beyond Yharon’s control, to the point where he was too afraid that he was going to meet his end. His (pitched) screams echoed throughout the helium.
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ I ran out of ideas so I’m just gonna kill off BoB by saying he tripped on a pebble (while visiting Bloons Tower Defense 6 The Tower Defense Game) onto a nail and tragically popped. His last words were “I hate those damn monkeys.” The End.