>Be me
>Be sitting in my second period cop lit class
>The teacher is pretty chill, let's call him Eric
>We were all working on the last part of our newspaper and everything was behind schedule
>Eric says to the class "Okay guys let's finish this as quickly and painlessly as possible"
>The 3rd grader within me immediately things to myself "that's what she said"
>Laugh internally
>Internal laughing turns into out loud laughing
>Everybody turns to look at me laughing at nothing including Eric
>Eric asks me what's so funny
>Tell him I just remembered a joke
>He asks wut
>I freeze up and almost say that's what she said allowed
>Everybody has stopped what they are doing to stare directly at me
>Waitingforanontofuckthisup.avi
>Immediately rack my brain for school appropriate things to blurt out
>Practically scream the first thing that comes to mind
>BEEP BEEP LETTUCE
>Eric doesn't know how to respond to this
>Tells everybody to get back to work and says nothing the entire class
>Mfw some kids I've never seen before walk over to my table and hand me lettuce
>Mfw everybody calls me lettuce for the rest of the year
>Mfw Eric now refers to me solely as lettuce

Is this a troll or are you actually attempting this? It's not even no nut november yet.

Sign me the fuck up to whatever website I need to pay to watch more of that good shit.

Be me
Be getting coffee
Girl takes my order
She starts to make my coffee
Finishes preparing my coffee
I take a sip
I just drank liquid that a female produced for me
l8tr virgins

I'll go first

Be me
Be at a party with no adults
Be 15 year old beta disguised as alpha
Attempting to attract a m8
Qt 3.14 detected
Okay anon you can do this
Walk over to her
She looks at me and waits for me to say something
fuck.jpg
I spontaneously remembered a meme I was watching a few minitues before
I blurt it out to try and break the tension
"Hey girl mind if I Shifty Shaft my Tilted Towers into your Moisty Mire"
Fuck
Fuck
Fuck
Fuck
Fuck
Turns out she plays fortnite
She thought it was funny
So relived that I almost feel baked
So euphoric that without thinking I say "Oh really, I think fortnite is for THOTS. BEGONE THOT.
Spend the rest of the night locked in my friends bedroom playing VRChat
11/10 would play VRChat again

For everybody that wants to post a green text and is to lazy to go to 4Chan. Please don't copy paste your greentexts from elsewhere and try to come up with your own.

I bngd yr mum lol u gay

This much I've gathered.

XD wow thanks.

I'm new to this group, but whats up with you guys roasting Zero? Someone fill me in on this shit.